I Found Out I Can’t Have Children. Now What?

Parenthood is a big responsibility. However, it’s also a journey most couples plan to take together eventually. So, it can be challenging to deal with an infertility diagnosis. If you were trying to start a family, it is much tougher to handle. From the emotional fallout to relationship issues — infertility can cause several problems.

It’s a good idea to cope with it as a couple. Work through the diagnosis together, and find out what your other options are. After all, being infertile doesn’t mean you can’t start a family. Of course, you will also have to protect your mental health. You need a support system, whether that is family members or mental health professionals, or both, is up to you. Being told you’re infertile — whether you wanted to start a family or not — is a tough pill to swallow. If you know you can’t have children and are wondering what you should do next, read on.

Don’t rush into a decision.


After an infertility diagnosis, couples are often immediately presented with alternatives. It’s great to learn that you have options, but it may not make you feel better. And, several couples learn to embrace it and enjoy a childfree life together. If you weren’t sure whether you wanted children, this is an excellent time to think about it. Is parenthood the right option for you? Or is the emotional pain you feel a natural by-product of your diagnosis?

First, find comfort doing something together as a couple. Take a vacation together, or find solace in an activity you both enjoy. It can be challenging to confront infertility. Before you do, make sure that you’re both prepared and mentally ready for the conversation.

Talk to a mental health professional.

There are several psychological impacts of infertility that you may have to face. Mental health issues are prevalent, so don’t ignore feelings of anxiety or depression. You can find solace by talking to your partner or a family member. However, it’s usually best to find a mental health professional to help you out. Remember, look for a good therapist who will spend time helping you adjust to this new reality.

The right therapist can help you accept your situation. A reputable place like WithTherapy will provide everything from emergency mental health visits to consistent emotional support. If you’re considering other methods, a psychiatrist can talk to you about your options. Sometimes, infertility can cause issues within your relationship as well. Your best option here is to find a therapist for couples therapy. Also, consider things like family therapy. A family therapist will help your family understand your emotional problems better. Healing takes time, but it’s a lot easier with a proper mental health provider.

Consider an egg donor.

If you want to start a family, infertility doesn’t have to ruin your plans. Look into other options, such as egg donation and surrogacy. An egg donor facility can help hopeful parents start a family. You can check your eligibility with genetic tests. You can often opt for in vitro fertilization, where they fertilize the egg outside of the body. If egg retrieval is not an option for you, you can choose an egg donor for this process. During the egg donation process, doctors will usually ask for your medical history. If you cannot carry the baby, an egg donation program will often help you find a surrogate for your child.

These days, you can start the egg donation process online. An egg donor agency will usually give you access to their donor egg files once you sign up. You typically have to fill out a form with some personal information. It can include an email address or other contact information. Once you pick an egg donor, the fertility clinic will help you every step of the way. Look for an egg donation program within your area to get the best search results. For example, to search for egg donors in South California, type in “egg donor Los Angeles” or add a more specific area. You could also get more targeted results if you look within your zip code.

Think about adoption.

Have you considered adoption? If you are eager to start a family and don’t want to go down the egg donor route, this is a good idea. An added benefit is that you will help a child find a loving, stable home. Hopeful parents have several options when it comes to adoption. And, families who adopt are usually pleased with their decision.

The easiest method is to contact an adoption agency. If you’re willing to adopt an older child, a social worker can help you find one who needs a home. While most couples want newborns, older children need homes as well. Some older children may have missed the mark on adoption and age out of foster care. Others need new homes because their parents suffer from substance abuse issues and are unfit to raise children. Helping a child in need to find a loving home can be extremely fulfilling aspect of parenthood.

Name: Pacific Fertility Center Los Angeles Address: 10921 Wilshire Blvd Ste 700, Los Angeles, CA 90024 Phone: (310) 209-7700

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